Republican presidential candidate Chris Christie (R) unveiled his proposal to deal with immigration, reported the Huffington Post. He wants to track undocumented immigrants like a FedEx package.

“So here’s what I’m gonna do if I’m president,” said Christie. “I’m gonna ask Fred Smith, the founder of FedEx, come work with the government for three months. Just come for three months to Immigration and Customs Enforcement and show these people.”

“We need to have a system that tracks you from the moment you come in,” he added. “And then when your time is up . . . then we get you. Tap you on the shoulder and say ‘excuse me, thanks for coming, time to go.’”

FedEx spokesperson Jennifer Caccavo declined to comment on New Jersey Gov. Christie’s outrageous immigration plan. However, she did describe the process in which a package is tracked. The company uses bar-code technology and tracking numbers to maintain shipments. Each package is scanned about 13 times from drop off to delivery.

Implanting humans with microchips or tattooing them with bar-codes isn’t going to go well with the crazy fundamentalist types who fear the End Times. On the other hand, they may support the plan because it’s for immigrants. Christie’s plan is a mess, either way.